The most common mistake most couples make when trying to conceive is not focusing on men’s health.
In my practice and working with clients in preparation for baby 90% of the time I only see woman.
Female fertility is HUGE and you can’t go anywhere without seeing or hearing about it, in books, TV and online. What you don’t hear as much about is Male Factor, Sperm Parameters, Male fertility. It is there if you search hard enough, usually a paragraph or two in a book or article but not enough time and attention is being directed at this issue.
Male Factor Infertility is on the rise and its time we start addressing it.
When I meet with a new client or couple, one of my first questions is “Have you had any hormone and fertility diagnostics done, has your partner/husband had his sperm checked?” Often the answer is no and I direct them to have the necessary appointments and get it done as soon as they can.
We then get started with our plans while waiting on this info and month after month there is a hope that a positive test will happen. I will have eventually gotten all of her tests back and they appear normal I ask again, “Has your husband gone for his test?” Usually I get answers back such as “ Not Yet, he’s holding off until next cycle to see if he can get away without doing it, he’s been busy, I’ve asked, he said he’d do it but hasn’t yet.
I get it, KINDA….. It’s uncomfortable…….embarrassing…….potentially going to reveal a blow to their manhood or something like that…(not true by the way).
My response is always the same. It’s uncomfortable to have multiple blood tests, HSG’s, ongoing ultrasounds and taking a pharmacy worth of vitamins and fertility drugs. Not to mention the heartbreak of trying month after month and being continually disappointed and asking yourself what’s wrong with you, what can you do better or differently? It’s not fair to you to constantly be taking all of this on yourself, especially when you’re missing a huge piece of the data.
Male Factor is 50% of the equation but it’s often an afterthought?
Why is this?
I’m not saying that magically this information will fix everything, but it will allow you to know if there is a direction that needs to be taken. Perhaps part of your money and focus should be allocated in treating your partner. Perhaps this information means having to go down entirely different avenues that were not planned or expected. Or, if everything is good and both of your tests are normal which is often the case, then you can relax a little and begin the process of regaining trust in your body, recreate the belief that it’s possible.
Putting the huge hamster wheel in your head to rest can do so much from reigniting the passion in your relationships, allowing deeper connection within your bodies and tapping into your feminine potential.
In the comments below, what excuse are you or your partner using to not find out all of the information? What’s holding you back?
XO
Ashley
